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As we went our separate ways, I laid back in the car listening to Jhene Aiko's voice coming through the speakers while slipping off my heels. I closed my eyes and let her lyrics take my mind off the paps and focus on my breathing. As often as I have been in the spotlight, I have never gotten use to the media. The constant scrutiny and attention often made me cringe and go into hiding. I was able to keep them out of my life during my time at boarding school but once I began to make a name for myself outside of my family's, they popped back up. Only a few things seemed to aid my anxiety concerning them: a good drink, a smoke session or conversations with my daughter's father. Since it was late 2 out of the 3 were out of the question.
I opened my eyes not realizing I had fallen asleep on the drive home. I reached for my phone and saw my publicist had messaged assuring me she was busy doing damage control. I replied, "and see about hiring security for me so this doesn't happen again." I lay my phone down and looked up to see how far we were from my home. As I looked around and saw we were about 10 minutes out, I reached for the glass of Ciroc that was sitting in the cup holder and took a sip. I let out a sigh as the liquor went down my throat and I felt a slight burn in my chest. After wiping my lip, I sat the glass down, reached for my bag and slid back into my heels. "Should we circle the block Ms Burgos?" my driver asked before pulling up to my street. I looked up and said, "Please... I don't want to take any chances... this night has been crazy enough..."
After circling a few times, it was all cleared to pull onto my street. I thanked him for indulging me for the last few minutes and tipped him extra. I wanted to be sure he didn't have a moment like the busy boy at the restaurant. I watched and waited for him to pull out of my gate and immediately walked inside and changed the code to the gate. I slipped out of my shoes for the final time and high tailed it to the kitchen to grab my essentials for my self care session: wine and champagne. I sat my bag aside on the kitchen counter and reached for a bottle of merlot. After pouring a glass, I pulled my hair up into a bun and grabbed a bottle of champagne. As I walked upstairs and into my master bathroom, I started a bath, a playlist and undressed while sipping on my wine. While the music played in the background, I slowly climbed into the bath and let the warm water soothe
my body and take away my worries.
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